5.5k on NaNoWriMo. So far so good! My goal is to write up to a days worth in the morning before work and in the evening. If I miss one or the other, it won't put me under and if I hit both I'll... allow myself dessert or something like it. It's a solid plan.

In other news, heels do some damn good things to my legs. Yesterday I had to give a status report on our findings thus far and figured I'd use the semi-informal opportunity to dress the part. The black Oxford heels, seamed tights, short black trench and carefully applied makeup had my female coworkers complimenting my outfit, male coworkers asking if I had a hot date and strangers offering to pump my gas.
Femininity can have quite the effect.

Back to the grind!

Intrusion

The last couple months have been tough.

He hovers on the edge of my thoughts, distracting me and hindering my ability to move forward, like a weight to my ankle. He was such a large part of my life that I can't seem to move on. I hear friends say his name a room over in hushed tones, like they're afraid I'll hear and lose my mind. Many of the good things I've gotten involved in, or have started for myself were initiated, or strongly encouraged by him, so now I don't have anywhere to hide. Do I find new hobbies? Do I stick it out and try to ignore the memories? How, or is it even possible for me to make these things my own?

This being said, I have been keeping an eye out for people I may be interested in spending some time with. Just an eye, no reaching, grasping hands or outrageous overtures. No one seems interesting enough. Intelligent enough. Shines enough in my opinion. Is this because I have set unrealistic expectations to stay isolated or am I not looking hard enough? So many questions! 'Am I doing this right?', 'Should I change my approach to this?', 'What is wrong with me?'...

I've been walking to try to think things through. For hours and hours. Nearly every night. And I've extended an invitation for anyone to join me if they felt like it. A couple nights in and I have an acquaintance asking to tag along. Thinking it might relieve some of the heaviness, I agreed. We talked a lot, we walked in silence, I got out some little bit of my frustration by ranting to him. He tries to kiss me.

Wait. This is wrong. All of this is wrong. Why in HELL would you try to put the moves on a new friend who's been actively vulnerable in your presence while trying to get over a long relationship? I had to force myself to walk away from that near-miss of a homicide. So much rage was boiling through me, I could barely hear and I just needed to get away.

I just don't know what to do anymore.

Murphy's Law

I have a bad feeling about today. Nothing has gone right yet, and my normally sunny exterior is starting to smudge. Time to keep my head down and roll with the punches, maybe I'll be able to decompress later.

Magical World

I've started to realize that not everyone would think that my career-path is the most exciting or desirable. Shocking, people having their own opinions, would never have guessed.
Study->Work->More Study & Work
Some folk don't enjoy learning. Some folk don't enjoy being outside. Or exercise. Or discovery. And and and. This idea just seems crazy to me because I do enjoy it. An excuse to be paid for being outside most of the day? Flexible schedules, the ability to choose the site that interests you, possibly manage your own site?
While I've been working on the Stone Street dig with the good people from the Ziibiwing this summer, I've been keeping up with some of my Anthro-Archaeology friends who've ventured further abroad. Konieczny and Resowski, for example, have just gotten back from the biblical city of Sha'arayim, currently Khirbet Qeiyafa in Israel.
Just tell me that doesn't get your blood going!

Perhaps some day, (maybe even some day soon!) my path will change and I'll reach towards a more settled goal. One with less stiff muscles and sore knees at the end of the day and more... waxing philosophical in an arm chair with a bubble pipe.
There's not enough restless in my soul to remain a pot hunter for the rest of my life. There's determination in spades, but I know enough to keep my eyes out for opportunities. I'll try to keep the last phrase of Calvin and Hobbes in my head:

"It's a magical world, Hobbes, ol' buddy... Let's go exploring!"

Luckily Blessed, and Blessed with Luck.

Flipping through notebooks and happened upon some musings I feel like expanding in this blog.

• I'm an American, living in a (currently!) strong superpower of a first world country.
• I'm a female of the 21st century, a time in which women have more power than ever before.
• I have at least a modest intelligence and the access to education.
• I have my youth.
• I'm a member of a large, supportive extended family, with a tight knit core that I would do anything for, and who would do the same for me.
• I have a small number of close friends that I would trust with my life, and a larger number of positive acquaintances whom I enjoy spending time with.
• I have the means to support myself.
• I'm semi-attractive, somewhat confident, and self-assured, though constantly striving for self-improvement.
• 
  
• For all of this, I'm incredibly blessed, lucky, or a little bit of both.
• 
  
• And for all that I complain about silly little things... I'm very happy to be myself and wouldn't have it any other way.
  

Trench D!

Another successful day of dirt and dirt-related activities! Finishing up the contents of Trench D, and I think we've figured on a total of 26 individuals disinterred from the mound left by the backhoe. That's just ONE trench, people.

And yes I do, in fact, work on an Indian burial ground. For the season, that is. Come the cold weather I'll probably be stuck indoors washing/cataloging/indexing all the fun things we've been pulling out of the earth this summer. Thank god I'm a patient woman.

Speaking of seasons! We've had another day that's been pretending to be Autumn, today. High of 69, low of 49, overcast with a strong wind. I'll have to make sure I set aside a week-end to bid farewell to the good weather. Find somewhere, preferably a lake, that I can wrap up my summery goals! Swimming, cherry pie, reading in the sun (perhaps in a hammock?), and more cooking/picnicking in the great outdoors. Commence the plotting...

Musashi & Kojiro

I believe we had a discussion about Musashi. So, before I forget.

Kate Beaton--- ENGAGE.

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